This is an epic true story. When I lived in Kanab over the summer, I worked a lot. Whenever I wasn't working I was chilling at my house. That's right, I lived alone in a house. It was built by my Great-Grandfather back in the 20's. I really enjoyed the space, and also the chance to revisit my roots. There was however one slight downside. Outside, there was a freaking lot of roaches. They rarely got inside, so I didn't care much, and yet, the fact that at any given time at night there were a half dozen roaches chilling on my porch got under my skin. It slowly ate me up inside, until I finally snapped and decided to fight back, my way.
In a nearby shrub I found a red foam samurai sword, no doubt deposited by one of my cousins when they were living there. I extracted the weapon, and saw that it was sound. Of course I was also wearing a cowboy hat, as I worked at a chuckwagon cookout where we fed foreign tourists. So wearing my hat, and wielding the red foam sword of death, I exacted revenge on the roaches. Night after night, week after week, I continued the slaughter, and yet they kept coming, daring me. In the end, I left defeated, but with my honor still intact.
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