I chopped off my hair like the weak-willed loser that I am.

It's true. If I had a computer to store my pictures on I'd show you before and after pics. I take a small degree of comfort in knowing that I shattered my old record and basically put myself permanently out of reach of my little brother Derek. We've had this competition running since we were small children. Up until Derek's sophomore year (the year after I graduated) I held the record. Derek was able to withstand my parents long enough to beat my record substantially, partly because his hair is curly so he could get away with it longer. After my mission however I didn't cut my hair besides some trims in the back for over a year. I took back the record with gusto but eventually I caved. This time around I went for well over a year without even a trim. My hair made it past my shoulders and I saw that it was glorious. However, all good things must come to an end, and as the sun must always set, so too must I bow myself to the norms of society. My brother is now married though with a baby on the way. So he basically conceded defeat, although he didn't rule out making a run at my record after retirement. As it stands now though, this is truly the end of an era.