There is a public pool across the street from my apartment. I pass it every time I walk to campus. This morning I was particularly surprised when I heard what sounded to me like screams of pain accentuated by the exclamation, "I'M DYING!" Needless to say, I peeled my ears for further signs that something dastardly was going down in the kiddie pool. What I heard next inspired this blog post: Children's laughter.
Why is it that whenever kids get near water they start screaming in agony, for fun? As a single guy, it is something that I'm not used to. When I hear something like, "I can't breathe! I am drowning! AAAAARGH!" I think someone can't breath and is drowning. Somebody is in real, terrifying distress. They're not. They are in two feet of water flicking each other, or batting each other around with water noodles.
Also, how is it that a parent can discern the fake screams of terror from the real ones? It sounds like WWIII is erupting in the pool and moms are sitting there chatting about recipes or whatever. I have dialed 9-1-1 and my finger is inching towards the send button, and they are discussing baby shower plans. Maybe it takes practice. Maybe it is innate like the ewe's instinctive ability to identify it's lamb's bleat. Yet if something was to really go wrong, I'm sure the moms would be the first to recognize it. Crisis averted. The pool apocalypse is staved off yet again.